In Australia our government welfare system forces you to put your child in daycare if you are receiving benefits and citing looking after your child as an impediment to work. Childcare is also very expensive but the .gov helps pay for it... Its an insidious plan and hard to avoid it if you need the money. Luckily I have a partner and we can afford (just) for me to stay at home for awhile with our baby.
You know, I am old enough to remember a time when a young woman would not consider marrying a man who could not provide for her, and the children they would have. It was considered socially irresponsible, and -- gasp -- immoral. The notion that two people who "love" each other have a "right" to get married, and a "right" to have children, and to have those children supported by more responsible people who delayed such gratification through their taxes would have been laughed at.
I have no objection to the two parents reversing roles, but one parent simply MUST stay home to raise the children.
You know, about once a month there is a story of X number of cats or dogs being removed from the house of some old lady, and everyone tsk, tsks. How terrible for the poor animals! But every morning people pack their CHILDREN off to equally crowded mad houses called day care centers.
Ha! Mothers who work feel 'guilty'...What about the mothers who feel guilty for NOT working? People think you should be bringing in money, or just be doing something 'useful' besides being at home. I have a college degree but I have chosen to raise my family and work hard here at home for now. I just don't have a pay stub to show for it.
I think that part of the problem is that many parents choose not to sacrifice, to “do without.” They have new cars, expensive cable TV packages, cell phones for the family, ipods for everyone, etc. The children, having never been told they couldn’t have something, then grow up and expect the same lifestyle. The amount of people who live beyond their means has always been amazing to me.
I now live on an Army base in Germany. Our base is one of the most-deployed bases since we’re so close to the Middle East. I will say that I’m amazed how many mothers work. Now, as a family who hasn’t yet sold their stateside home (and hasn’t been able to rent it), I realize that families may have financial obligations that can’t be “seen.” However, most of these families have two cars (and usually they look pretty darn new!), cell phones for all, ipods, designer clothes, they shop ‘on the economy’ often (even when the dollar was/is so low compared to the euro), and eat out regularly. No wonder these mothers feel they have to work - they can barely cover their expenses! And don’t forget the child care costs on top of it!
But are these expenses necessary? Not in my opinion. We have gotten by for 15 months with one car. Yes, it requires planning, but it can be done. There is a shuttle bus system here (inadequate and time-consuming, but at least it’s here) and we walk a lot when my husband has the car. We try to eat out infrequently and we rarely shop on the economy. I have a hard time justifying why I would need an item that costs so much more when I have to pay euros. When our small PX doesn’t have an item, we usually do without. It’s amazing what you don’t really need – lol.
My biggest concern with these choosing-to-work mothers is the affect on the kids, of course. When their fathers (or sometimes mothers) deploy for a year at a time, I don’t think that the children of these mothers feel the same type of security as those whose mothers are HOME waiting for them when they come home from school, who are there to take them to afterschool activities/sports, who are simply there.
When we decided to join the Army back in 2008, we knew deployments would hit us especially hard since my husband had had a home-business. So not only would he begin to work out of the house, he would eventually be GONE for a year at a time. Thank goodness that we’d already made the commitment to our children and not things!! It’s hard enough for these military children, but I don’t see why so many of the mothers choose to make it more difficult.
In Australia our government welfare system forces you to put your child in daycare if you are receiving benefits and citing looking after your child as an impediment to work. Childcare is also very expensive but the .gov helps pay for it... Its an insidious plan and hard to avoid it if you need the money.
ReplyDeleteLuckily I have a partner and we can afford (just) for me to stay at home for awhile with our baby.
You know, I am old enough to remember a time when a young woman would not consider marrying a man who could not provide for her, and the children they would have. It was considered socially irresponsible, and -- gasp -- immoral. The notion that two people who "love" each other have a "right" to get married, and a "right" to have children, and to have those children supported by more responsible people who delayed such gratification through their taxes would have been laughed at.
ReplyDeleteI have no objection to the two parents reversing roles, but one parent simply MUST stay home to raise the children.
You know, about once a month there is a story of X number of cats or dogs being removed from the house of some old lady, and everyone tsk, tsks. How terrible for the poor animals! But every morning people pack their CHILDREN off to equally crowded mad houses called day care centers.
Bill Smith
Ha! Mothers who work feel 'guilty'...What about the mothers who feel guilty for NOT working? People think you should be bringing in money, or just be doing something 'useful' besides being at home. I have a college degree but I have chosen to raise my family and work hard here at home for now. I just don't have a pay stub to show for it.
ReplyDeleteI think that part of the problem is that many parents choose not to sacrifice, to “do without.” They have new cars, expensive cable TV packages, cell phones for the family, ipods for everyone, etc. The children, having never been told they couldn’t have something, then grow up and expect the same lifestyle. The amount of people who live beyond their means has always been amazing to me.
ReplyDeleteI now live on an Army base in Germany. Our base is one of the most-deployed bases since we’re so close to the Middle East. I will say that I’m amazed how many mothers work. Now, as a family who hasn’t yet sold their stateside home (and hasn’t been able to rent it), I realize that families may have financial obligations that can’t be “seen.” However, most of these families have two cars (and usually they look pretty darn new!), cell phones for all, ipods, designer clothes, they shop ‘on the economy’ often (even when the dollar was/is so low compared to the euro), and eat out regularly. No wonder these mothers feel they have to work - they can barely cover their expenses! And don’t forget the child care costs on top of it!
But are these expenses necessary? Not in my opinion. We have gotten by for 15 months with one car. Yes, it requires planning, but it can be done. There is a shuttle bus system here (inadequate and time-consuming, but at least it’s here) and we walk a lot when my husband has the car. We try to eat out infrequently and we rarely shop on the economy. I have a hard time justifying why I would need an item that costs so much more when I have to pay euros. When our small PX doesn’t have an item, we usually do without. It’s amazing what you don’t really need – lol.
My biggest concern with these choosing-to-work mothers is the affect on the kids, of course. When their fathers (or sometimes mothers) deploy for a year at a time, I don’t think that the children of these mothers feel the same type of security as those whose mothers are HOME waiting for them when they come home from school, who are there to take them to afterschool activities/sports, who are simply there.
When we decided to join the Army back in 2008, we knew deployments would hit us especially hard since my husband had had a home-business. So not only would he begin to work out of the house, he would eventually be GONE for a year at a time. Thank goodness that we’d already made the commitment to our children and not things!! It’s hard enough for these military children, but I don’t see why so many of the mothers choose to make it more difficult.
KatieJ
Germany
(Sorry this was so long.)