Country Living Series

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Odds 'n ends

So this morning I "boxed" Matilda into her milking pen with a wooden pallet as usual, sat down on the milking crate, and got ready to milk. Suddenly she hunched over and started to urinate. When a Jersey pees, it's like a pungent Niagara Falls back there. The sheer volume is impressive, let me tell you.

Now normally this isn't a problem; she gives me enough warning that I can sweep the milking bucket, crate, and myself out of the way before anything gets splashed.

But now she's in a stall with her back leg hobbled, rather than having her hind end free to assume to necessary position to urinate (hunched over, tail raised). This mean she peed all over the pallet I use to block her in, as well as her hobble and, worst of all, her tail.

Okay, fine, whatever. I reassembled the milking bucket and crate, sat down, and squeezed a teat.

Immediately I got whipped in the face with a urine-soaked tail.

Ug! I wiped down and tried to squeeze again. This time the whip was more like a splash, with urine dripping down my face. Are we having fun yet?

I abandoned Matilda for a minute to go in the house and get a wet dishcloth to wipe down my face. I brought it out with me to use again which, in fact, I'm glad I did because I got whipped again. Not my best morning milking. My husband remarked, "Well, it's just more material for the blog." Next time I'll tie her tail.

Ug, the joys of country living.

"Who, me?"

By the way, this is one of our barn cats, JJ (short for Jasper/Jasmine because for the longest time we didn't know the gender; turns out it's a girl). JJ was a feral cat, crippled in one leg and blind in one eye and so skittish that for years she was merely a gray shadow who would slink around and eat the cat food only when no one was around.

But rather unexpectedly in the last four months or so, JJ has decided that people are the greatest thing since sliced bread. I guess she finally figured out we weren't going to hurt her. It took her awhile to accept pets, but now she's so hungry for attention that she is literally underfoot. We've accidentally kicked or tripped over her a number of times because she twines himself around our legs when we're not expecting it (like when we're carrying something bulky to the car, for example).

JJ and Kitkat (another friendlier stray who adopted us) keep the mice down in the barn.


  1. Sheesh, did any of Matilda's urine get into the milk bucket? I think I'd leave the farm if I had to drink urinated milk. ROFL

  2. Just a follower who is grateful to have found you... can't remember how. Love your posts! And thought I'd suggest tying that tale to a pallet board, one that you can't forget to untie before your release her from milking, and just past the meaty part of her tail, where it's just hair, so you don't hurt her. My jersey did that too me quite often when I'd milk shortly after her last calf was born, so I'd tie it up every morning. I guess the fun of swatting me with the tale ended when she realized she couldn't really get me! Though I never had to hobble those legs, thankfully. I wouldn't know how to do that without getting kicked!
    :) Karin

  3. Aw heck. A little pee ain't gonna hurt nothin.

    Don'tcha know that's how they discovered buttermilk?


    Sorry y'all. Couldn't help it.

    A McSp

  4. Ah, come on, it's the runny poop & urine soaked tail across your face that makes you lick your lips. Seriously, Gotta love your own milk from your own cow to put up with stuff like that...I do, thank you very much.

  5. Off topic, but I thought you were a Conservative. Now I see Libertarian.
    Libertarians promote "freedom" to use any drug desired. As someone who lives in a community ravaged by drug use, I can tell you that drugs are not freedom, they are a quick trip to enslavement. With a huge population, rules are necessary. Libertarians are a little too close to anarchists for my comfort. Hope you will reconsider your political stance.

  6. Oh yes, yes - do reconsider your political stance on account of some nameless twit is "uncomfortable" with you.


    Steve Davis
    Anchorage, Alaska

  7. Well, Steve, I'm very concerned about the future of this country. If that makes me a "nameless twit" in your opinion - so be it.

  8. Hey all you anonymous people out there. Your "concern" or BS as it where will do NOTHING! Get your a-- out there and talk to people face to face. If they hate you for it at least you can sleep easy at night. Until you hear that knock on the door at 3:00AM. Does this sound funny? I had a cop ringing my door bell a few days ago. I did not answer and after he snooped around a bit he left. Try getting back to sleep after that.