Sunday, April 22, 2012

A little less arrogance, please

I received a snark a few days ago, and have been debating about whether to post it or not. I’ve decided to compromise and post parts of it.

First, a little background. Way back when I was in high school, I decided I wanted to be a field biologist, a second Jane Goodall. I burned with the desire to study animals in their natural habitats, to live a rugged outdoor life. To that effect, I knew I couldn’t be a high-maintenance kind of woman.

This attitude continued through college, through summers working in the field, and even into my post-college years working in office buildings. In fact, that early training has never really left me, which perhaps accounts for my satisfaction to live an unglamorous life shoveling manure and milking cows on a farm.

But clearly not everyone feels the same way. We all know someone (usually a woman) who is high-maintenance, whose raven locks can only be touched with organic grape-leaf and wild-hemp shampoo costing $15 a bottle.

Well, that’s the kind per woman who just sent the snark, who was “absolutely disgusted” with my attitude on fashion. “For some one with no interest in fashion you seem to spend a lot of time mocking those who enjoy doing their hair and makeup and dressing in nice clothes,” she wrote. “I am the type of girl who spends thousands of dollars on handbags and shoes, I have no interest in living in the country or farming.” [Which begs the question, why are you hanging around a blog that focuses on living in the country and farming? Just asking.]

The gist of the woman’s argument was how she would never dream of mocking us for our “People of Walmart”-style fashions, how she wouldn’t lower herself to say anything negative about our clothes, and she “would never dream of making fun and demeaning those who find enjoyment from country living.”

“I find your clothes in the pictures you have on your blog to be embarrassing and ridiculous,” she adds, “but I would never make a post on my blog showing shoes you like that I find ugly and proceeding to mock them. If you don't like how someone dressed that’s your problem, not theirs.” She concludes by saying, “Please consider that before you try to shame another person into conforming to your world view. Now I'm going to take my own advice and find a new blog to read that contains a little less arrogance.”


My first thought upon reading her email was, Good riddance to bad rubbish. But then I had a second thought: maybe she’s a little bit right.

You see, I regard high-maintenance women with genuine puzzlement. Unless you’re wealthy, anyone who spends “thousands of dollars on handbags and shoes” instead of sensible things like paying off debt or paying down the principle on your mortgage or even buying some storable food just makes me shake my head in wonderment. I truly don’t get it.

And what will happen to people like this if the bleep hits the fan? What good are their “thousands of dollars” worth of handbags and shoes then?

Yet the fashion industry is unquestionably massive. As I wrote in an earlier post, "I suppose I can't get down too hard on fashion and makeup sites. There's nothing illegal or immoral about them. They feed huge international industries that employ millions. And women have taken an interest in fashion and makeup since the dawn of civilization, so my sour grapes doesn't change that historical fact. I guess my concern is when women become so obsessed with the shallow to the exclusion of the serious, it makes me concerned that they won't be able to handle anything BUT the shallow. On the other hand, I suppose I shouldn't worry. Scarlet O'Hara started shallow and look how she pulled off handling a war."

So for those whom I’ve offended because of arrogance for my views on fashion, I tender my apologies. But I’m not gonna stop poking fun. If that will continue to offend, then you may prefer to read one of the many different blogs on the internet that focuses on fashion.

47 comments:

  1. I am considered by most of my peers to be wealthy...or high-end comfortable...no mortgage, own lots of land and pay cash for everything...including my cars. The idea of spending thousands on shoes and purses makes me physically ill. Spending thousands on starting Community Gardens, Farm to School Lunch Programs, Farmers Markets, Recycling Centers, Women Escaping Violence Shelters, etc. makes much more sense to me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Though I am now what I consider high income (though the Gov tells me I am "middle class") I continue to dress my family in what is practical. While that is soemtimes expensive (heavy-duty work clothes can be!) I see no need to purchase expensive clothing just because it is expensive and I can show it off. I do have some things in life that I indulge in occasionally-like my favorite 6 dollar coffee drink-however it is not for the purpose of showing it to others or "making a statement". Perhaps if you are rich and have money to burn, buying a designer handbag and some silly shoes you can't walk in is your version of a $6 coffee...

    ReplyDelete
  3. i am considered by most of my peers to be far from wealthy, but not dirt poor either...i dont own lots of land but have a small homestead of five acres, which is not fallow ground but filled with gardens of veggies, fruits, and flowers, surrounded by woods and forest. i pay cash for most things. i have two purses, no high heels, a tube of lipstick and when i go to town i look clean and decent. most folks can tell though that i work hard outdoors and indoors from the shape my hands are in and from the reddened skin around my neck. i think your snarker is just over-sensitive to hearing the truths about herself and her kind..i would not apologize.

    ReplyDelete
  4. fashion is their god, not Jesus. jb

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great post!! Odd that she would be hanging out on your blog. Maybe she is a closet farmer wanta be, who knows. If clothes, shoes, hair and makeup are what you hang you
    self worth on you might be in for a pretty hard life down the road. My biggest beef with the fashion industry right now is why do they have to make so many things trashy. Trashy is trashy no matter what you spend on it, but pretty clothes that make you feel pretty has it's place, a little goes a long way.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Patrice, why change anything?

    Your site is an excellent example of capitalism and our Constitution at work. Readers are exercising their First Amendment right to associate with you and your site. You are producing a product that we choose to consume. We enjoy the fact that you do not succumb to silly yet potentially dangerous political correctness. The PC crowd’s goal is censorship and destruction of our First Amendment rights. Your site is harming no one.

    Your ex-reader is dissatisfied with your product and is exercising her First Amendment right to not associate with this site. Sounds like a win-win situation to me.
    Montana Guy

    ReplyDelete
  7. (I hope this comment doesn't appear twice. When I tried to publish it a short time ago, it wouldn't go through and then I lost the connection to this blog, so I'm trying again.)

    Your latest snark attack says: "Now I'm going to take my own advice and find a new blog to read that contains a little less arrogance." I've read plenty of blogs. If there's one thing I've never felt was present in your blog, Patrice, it is arrogance! You and your daughters say you can't understand how any woman can wear some of those shoes you saw in the mall. You have every right to ask that question and to even poke fun at any money-wasting nincompoop who would buy those things and wear them. That's not being arrogant, it's telling the TRUTH! Anyone who is NOT arrogant will agree with you in a second! (As usual, your liberal snark twists the situation around to try to make YOU sound arrogant instead of HER.)

    I've known very few women who actually like to wear high-heels, including my wife and all 3 of our girls. The shoes you pictured went far beyond being "high." Good Lord, many of them have 5 or 6-inch heels, or higher! That's ridiculous! Any competent podiatrist will tell you that's very BAD for your feet, your legs, your back... you name it. So, you're accused of being "arrogant" for poking fun at those "shoes" (I use the word loosely) and the silly ninnies who wear them? Isn't that too bad. Your snark is just another liberal-progressive who can't admit she's wasting money better spent on more worthy products, not to mention possibly ruining her posture and her health. Remember, liberals are never wrong. They're always the only ones who are in step in the parade. Your first thought was right: Good riddance! --Fred in AZ

    ReplyDelete
  8. HI PATRICE,
    MY DAUGHTER (A GRADUATE OF A SMALL CLOTHING DESIGN SCHOOL) AND I OFTEN ARE AMUSED AS YOU ARE BY THE FASHIONS IN STORES. I NEVER THOUGHT YOU WERE BEING SNARKY OR MEAN IN YOUR COMMENTS, JUST ENJOYING THE EXTREME APPEARANCE OF WHAT YOU SEE.
    I CONSIDER YOUR COMMENTS TO EXPRESS YOUR TOLERANT AMUSEMENT OF HUMAN FOIBLES. AM I RIGHT/ I HOPE SO!
    MY DAUGHTER , WHO IS VERY ILL WITH LYME DISEASE AND CANNOT HOLD A JOB, OFTEN COSTUMES ACTORS IN A SMALL COMMUNITY THEATER HERE. SHE REALLY ENJOYS THE FIBRE ARTS, BUT SHE ALSO ENJOYS POKING FUN AT THE RIDICULOUS SHOES AND BARELY-COVERING CLOTHES (NOTICE THEY COST MORE THAN CLOTHES WITH MORE CLOTH IN THEM?).
    THANKS FOR YOUR BLOG. I FOUND IT WHEN LOOKING FOR CANNING RECIPES. WE ARE CONCERNED THAT THE FINANCIAL HOUSE OF CARDS WILL FALL AND THERE WILL BE NO FOOD. THANKS TO GOD WE HAVE GAS PIPED DIRECTLY IN FROM THE WELL ON THE PROPERTY BUT THE GAS COMPANY COULD PROBABLY CLOSE THAT IF THEY WANTED TO.
    I AM ALSO CONCERNED ABOUT BPA AND OTHER CONTAMINANTS.
    ALSO I NOTICED THAT AT CHURCH CAMP THE APPLE JUICE COMES FROM CHINA!!! AND THE CAMP IS IN PENNSYLVANIA, ONE OF THE APPLE CAPITOLS OF THE USA. I WONDERED WHY SO MANY OF THE SMALL ORCHARDS WE PASS ON THE WAY THERE ARE NEGLECTED.
    DEBORAH HARVEY

    ReplyDelete
  9. As anonymous at 7:41 am said, my family, also has been blessed to be successful. Not rich, but very comfortable. I thank the good Lord for our success, and my husband and I have worked hard and smart (most of the time, haha!) for the financial security that we have. I would never, ever, in a million years spend thousands on purses and shoes. I have some nice things and love to treat my mother with nice gifts for Christmas, birthdays, etc. She and my dad made many sacrifices to raise our large family, so being generous to her is a real treat for me. I do enjoy clothes and make-up, but am the opposite of high maintenance. I think us southern girls have always enjoyed "fixin up" and I do as well. However, even though I can afford to blow some money, I chose not to. My make-up comes from the drug store, most of my clothes from Ross, TJ Maxx or Marshall's, nobody loves the sales racks more than me. I wear casual clothes when I garden, cook, can, tend my chickens, sew or just loaf at home. I can clean up pretty good for Church, dinner parties or showers too. You have never offended this girly-girl/tomboy southerner at all. I love your blog and wonder myself, why was that woman reading it anyway?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Patrice,
    Does clothes really MAKE the man?
    NO.
    I judge no man based on what he wears. Rich or poor.
    It's what is under that protective coat of skin that makes the man.

    What is perplexing is that the fashion industry continues catering successfully, even in a global economic depression to produce high end cosmetics, fragrances, clothing, and accessories that are being purchased by those that have NO concerns of being breached or affected by this global monetary downturn. In fact the prices for any of these high end luxury items are scaling up with our inflation too.
    The purchasers just keep on purchasing them and perhaps some are charging up debts to acquire them.

    This Cognitive Dissidence will be their chaotic undoing in the future economic collapse.


    History repeats itself. Same format occurred in the 1930's Depression, when the rich jumped liked lemmings out of skyscrapers when the DAY of reality and reckoning hit them in their frontal lobe.

    Stay away from tall buildings. That Day of reckoning is coming again soon.

    And you know, if those 6 shooters could carry and shoot live rounds, I just might consider paying for a pair if they could embed the piece in a pair of hiker boots.

    notutopia

    ReplyDelete
  11. I refer to people with such obsession with what they wear, and drive and the people they know as just style over substance. For me I prefer substance, but I guess that's just my "style."

    ReplyDelete
  12. Patrice, I've been a long time reader, however, this is my first comment. What you posted of her comments leads me to believe she is feeling some guilt maybe?? While I do have to dress nice for work, it is with minimal expense and you will find me in overalls at home. It is possible to have a foot in both worlds without getting angry and I'm looking forward to the day I retire to my overalls.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I like how she says she would never make fun of your lifestyle. Doesn't she mean she would never publicly or directly to your face make fun of your lifestyle?

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm not sure that's there is really an equivalent give-and-take concerning different interests, here.

    A fashion-oriented blog might poke fun at farmer boots or waterman waders, but they certainly can't deny their utility. But your blog (rightly) observes that these fashion-statement ankle-breakers have no utility whatsoever except to an orthopedic surgeon with bills to pay.

    This discussion reminds me of the disparity in living conditions highlighted in The Hunger Games between those living in the Districts (the producers) and those living in the Capitol (the consumers). The producers are wearing rags while eking out a starvation existence, but the consumers have nothing better to do than paint their skin, dye their hair hideous florescent shades of blue and/or orange, and be entertained by forcing children to kill each other.

    The whole point of "high fashion" seems to be the decided LACK of utility; if it's good for something, anything, the fashionistas disparage it as something that ought to be sold at an outlet store.

    Sigh. At least it's raining pretty hard right now, so I don't have to put on my ugly (that is, useful) boots to muck out the chicken coop and run this afternoon.

    ReplyDelete
  15. just wonder how the writer would manage with her shoes and handbags on a farm. Wonder how if she suddenly had to grow her own or pick her own how she would manage. what is wrong with the clothes on your blog??

    ReplyDelete
  16. I'm a little of both worlds. I spend most of our extra money on things like garden supplies or a new wheat grinder, but I do like to treat myself on occasion to high heels or a gorgeous dress. Would the money be better spent on food storage? Sure. But I enjoy getting dolled up sometimes, and since I don't break the bank doing it, I'm not worried.

    ReplyDelete
  17. How arrogant of her to come on your blog, i.e. your home, and criticize your choices in life.

    I think an appropriate thing for anyone who desires to comment on another person's blog is to read what you typed and make sure that it would be the same thing you would say to them face to face.

    Keep up the good work, I read your blog daily and enjoy it immensely.

    ReplyDelete
  18. The type of fashion you are speaking about reminds me of long ago and the visual way to tell if someone was wealthy or poor. The poorer class was fit, tan, and dressed for work. The wealthier class was fatter, white skinned, dressed for lounging. That was a status symbol back in the victorian era, to be fat. Now it seems we haven't moved so far from that. You can't do much work in those types of shoes. You just can't. This is why so many women that wear those shoes change to walk from the car to the office or to lunch. Even they know they are just for show. It's sad, really. And women's bodies are paying dearly for this fashion trend. Their legs, backs, and feet are never the same. We have, and will contiue to have, a bunch of elderly women that suffer for life with foot, leg, and back problems because of this damage they are doing to their bodies.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. These shoes remind me of the pre-1900s Chinese women whose feet were bound to make them small. Of course they could only take a few steps and couldn't do any work except needlework. It was a sign that the family could afford servants to do the other work. The binding was very painful and horribly distorted the feet, but everyone who saw the woman knew that the family was rich.

      Delete
  19. Hello Patrice,

    First, thank you for your blog. I am a young woman, uninterested in fashion, striving for land of my own, and trying to keep sight of the big picture in a society that lives only in the here and now. I read this blog solely for your homesteading, self-sufficient experiences, seeking information I will one day need. Your opinions are secondary to this and I take them with a grain of salt, no offense intended. They are what make your blog unique among others.

    I'd like to share the thoughts that came to my mind, regarding these last couple blog entries.

    I grew up as a Christian and ditched it in high school after seeing "good Christian girls" dissing "secular, worldly girls" over the myriad of things young high school girls care about (clothing choices being one of them).

    Actually I should say that this was just one part of why I'm no longer a Christian, there are other reasons that don't apply here.

    Anyway, they must have learned it from their parents, because I can't think of any other people with such a religious influence, except pastors and whatnot.

    I guess what I'm getting at is this: If you're a Christian, it doesn't matter if you love or hate high heels. It doesn't matter if you think a woman who wears them is smart ...or if she's stupid. I think that I would have been more interested in religion if the religious practiced what they preached more often, and that is to love one another.

    I am not religious in any way, but that doesn't change how I grew up. My dad was one of those people who loved all people because he believed they are children of God, they just need guidance. He quietly and permanently changed the lives of those around him.

    He of course disagreed and disliked many things. High heels may have been one of them. But I can't imagine him dissing other people's mundane choices like the type of shoes they wear, thereby distancing them and taking away any chance he had to witness and change their lives for the better.

    There were some things he just wouldn't tolerate. I think it's ok to pick and choose what you're tolerant of, on things like abortion, gay marriage, presidential candidates, and such. I think that if Christianity (or plain, simple compassion) plays any role in your life, however, that you should try to be less abrasive when announcing your views to the world. I hope that didn't come out as rude.

    On another note, I would think that attracting many and varied readers to your blog would be one of your goals. You have this blog full of information that a lot of people need. Please don't push them away, or shrug them off when they are offended, because they wear different shoes (i.e. disagree with you on something).

    Likewise, I think that religion has a lot of important information that people (the world) need too, like how to forgive and how to live in peace.

    It's more than just shoes, if you think about it.


    Respectfully,
    Amanda

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Amanda,

      I have to disagree with you on a couple of points. First, if you are no longer a Christian because of the sinful attitudes of some other Christians in high school, you were never one to begin with. The way they behaved is not the fault of the Lord Jesus Christ and you cannot blame your lack of faith in Him on others actions.

      Second, as Christians, we can't pick and choose on what we can be "tolerant" of in areas such as abortion (murder), or homosexuality (sexual immorality), even if we wanted to. To the Lord, it is sinful, and He is Holy and perfect, and cannot tolerate it Himself. On presidential candidates, yes, we can choose, but should be voting our conscience, whatever that may be.

      Blessings,
      Jane

      Delete
    2. Well said, Jane, and true.

      Delete
  20. Phyllis (N/W Jersey)April 22, 2012 at 4:39 PM

    I guess she did not read your entire banner - you know the part that says "In-your-face stuff from an opinionated north Idaho housewife". The day I retired was the happiest day of my life! No more looking perfect every day, no more heels, business suits and no more having to play the childish office games! I now live in jeans and work boots and love every minute of it. I'm finally free to be me! Too bad she lives her life having someone else decide who she should be. I feel sorry for her.

    ReplyDelete
  21. In the posts that I have read, I have taken your comments on fashion and other subjects as tolerant amusement. I disagree with Amanda that "you should try to be less abrasive". I find that your comments are not in the slightest bit abrasive. Especially when compared to other's comments on the internet. You don't HAVE to say anything, but then, none of us HAVE to read it. I wonder that Amanda used this post to put you down by implying that you are not a good enough Christian! Not only has no Christian EVER claimed to be perfect, but what was it you said that was so offensive? I mean REALLY? You hardly SAID anything at all. ( I don't recall you trying to SWAY me to conform to your world view) It was mostly pictures!
    TK

    ReplyDelete
  22. I confess to buying expensive shoes--the kind that I can wear for years and don't hurt my feet if I walk or stand for hours. They have cushioning that lasts for the long time that I have them. I bought 2 pairs recently for nearly $250 total--they replaced the 2 pairs that I had been wearing for work and "nice casual" for 20+ years. These may last me the rest of my life! I consider them an investment in healthy feet and a healthy back. Besides they look rather nice. I would hate to have to stand for hours in those 6" heels and walking in them would probably be something I couldn't accomplish.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are not buying "expensive shoes". You are purchasing quality equipment!
      TK

      Delete
    2. Hey, I need a pair of shooes like that! I'm tired of buying them and having them wear out. So glad I found this blog!

      Delete
  23. Careful Patrice, she sounds like she is from the world of the “moneyed people”.
    She probably has an assistant that is culling the prepper blogs for suitable minions that she will purchase when SHTF. You don't think her parents sent her to college to learn how to cook an egg or deliver a breech birth calf do you? And who will stomp the grape leaves for her shampoo?

    ReplyDelete
  24. I'm happy in sweats and sneakers and have absolutely no fashion sense whatsoever but after watching the movie "The Devil Wears Prada" I can understand why someone would take fashion seriously. I mean I think folks that lease cars, have big Mcmasions or buy figurines seem to have an odd hobby.
    If it makes them feel good and they have all the other stuff.... Why not!
    Also when I do splurge on an outfit I do tend to buy the Name brand stuff. I just get it at the Outlet store.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I hope I'm not to late for this party...

    Thousands of dollars on purses and shoes?

    Seriously?

    I hope that's AFTER she gave something to charity so that someone less fortunate might have a simple meal or a warm coat.

    Just Me

    ReplyDelete
  26. Sorry you got a snarky reply. I guess those of us who blog especially as preppers or "old fashioned" kind of people have to expect it. But I am sure your unhappy reader didn't go anywhere lol, mine sure haven't. I guess it is up to each of us to decide how to spend our hard earned money. I for one don't want to spend it on clothes, shoes or purses. As far as abrasive, you are not. I often think that people who are jealous are at a loss for words though, you should see some of the comments I have gotten lol! Anyway keep up the great blog. Most of us love it!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Patrice I am in 100% agreeance with you on fashion. I also do not understand why someone would want to spend hard earned cash on a pair of shoes that will hurt if you wear them. I am the kind of woman that does not want diamonds, flowers, new clothes, a spa treatment, pedicure or any of that rubbish as a gift. My whole family knows that if you get me a gift it had better be usefull like a grain grinder, food grade buckets, tattler lids, new socks etc. I like you am very opinionated and also live in the country. I have goats and chickens, a huge garden and am working on getting a barn. I have 5 acres and enjoy every bit of it. I wear "mom jeans" (that is what my oldest daughter calls sweats) and old T shirts. In the summer I live in shorts and shirts that in Arkansas we call "wife beaters" they are the white A line undershirts for men. Youngest daughter is 100% tomboy and also cares nothing about fashion but would rather be experimenting and doing "projects". I agree that anyone that is going to complain about a simple lifestyle and thinks we should be fashion aoriented needs to go away. My goats care nothing about how I look as long as I have some homemade granola in my hand. The chickens also thing my fashion sense is just fine. Also no one at church has ever complained about what I wear nor do they complain about my hubby wearing jeans when he serves at the Lords Table. I used to be in high management positions in healthcare (I was a RN for almost 20 years) I had to dress up and my boss was constantly telling me I had to knock off the rough edges for meetings with the mayor, etc. I hated that and am much happier now with my chickens and goats being my style judges.
    If they do not like what you are wearing then they need not look, If they do not like what you are writing then they need to opt out of the blog and quit hanging around us simple folks.

    ReplyDelete
  28. I have always found your posts on fashion to be quite funny. What people wear may or may not be sinful, but some of it sure is ugly and ridiculous. Not to mention what stupid things people do with their money. If they claim to be Christians, it's not very good stewardship of what God has given them IMHO.

    Jane

    ReplyDelete
  29. (I hope this comment only posts once, have technical problems here)

    And I don't consider you to be arrogant, Patrice. I don't think having a laugh over some outlandish fashions would fall under that category.

    Sounds like someone trying to shame you into thinking you're not a "nice" Christian. Don't listen.

    Jane

    ReplyDelete
  30. What will happen to people like this if the bleep hits the fan? Why they can whip up a skillet full of sausage gravy, pour it over their thousand dollar shoes and eat them. Don

    ReplyDelete
  31. In what way is making fun of an inanimate pair of objects "arrogant"? And since when do shoes have feelings? And if some person's feelings are hurt by another's opinion of their clothing choices or fashion sense, may I point out that that can only happen because she has chosen to place that person's opinion ABOVE HER OWN? Should I even mention what an immature, middle-school-like attitude that is?

    I wear heels to church and on dates with my husband because my husband likes to see me in them. The rest of the time, I live in work boots and those silly-looking but comfortable Crocs. I don't care what anyone thinks about that. The Crocs were a gift, and the people who gave them to me always smile when they see I'm wearing them. I care more about that than I do what any stranger thinks about my footgear or fashion sense.

    Xa Lynn

    ReplyDelete
  32. To the lady spending thousands of dollars on handbags & shoes: Can anyone say "low self-imagine?" oh! and God forbid your country club friends find out you're hanging out late nights reading blogs on home-steading. Talk about slumming!! LOLOL, a closet home-steader. Ma'am, you wouldn't make a pimple on a pigs hiney...

    ReplyDelete
  33. Sorry, this is off topic, but I thought you would be interested in what I saw in the toy aisle at Kmart yesterday. Hot Wheels Nose Art die-cast vehicles being sold in packaging featuring women in scanty clothing in suggestive poses. The suggested age for these toys? "8+" I couldn't believe my eyes. These are being marketed to EIGHT-YEAR-OLDS??? what is the world coming to... :( (Google Hot Wheels Nose Art and you'll see what I mean)

    I am so glad that I didn't have my boys (8 and 12) with me when I went down that aisle! We had a much better shopping experience in the tool department of our locally-owned thrift shop.

    Birdy

    ReplyDelete
  34. If you really want to know how you came to the attention of the "high maintenance" women just trot over to http://freejinger.org/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=9660

    They have a hive mentality and while they claim to want women to choose for themselves what they really want is for women to choose what THEY want. For example: If a woman chooses to be a minister, have a career, be a working mother, or be an atheist with no children those choices are applauded. If a woman chooses to get married young, have 6 children and stay at home to raise them in a Christian home they are mocked for their "brainwashed" behavior. It is ridiculous.

    Sorry you hit their radar. The are a sad bunch with too much time on their hands. Who can rack up thousands of posts making fun of others unless you have no life of your own.

    Perhaps they think it is still middle school.

    -K-

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aha! This explains a lot. I read over some of their posts and was amazed at all the free things we could have done -- in THEIR cities. I'm hoping they'll supply me with a list of free things I could do in Spokane.

      I suppose I should be flattered at their criticism. As for their knee-jerk defense of urban life... that's fine, let them have the cities.

      - Patrice

      Delete
    2. Ahh yes, freejinger, they are a miserable bunch. I think they have been here before, but I forget when it was. If you homeschool, or have several children, or wear dresses a lot, or are a Christian that really believes what the Bible says, you are going to be a target of their immaturity and stupidity. They seem to be very angry for some reason and take it out on people that they don't know. Who cares?

      Jane

      Delete
  35. Bxntrk ("be eccentric")April 23, 2012 at 10:50 AM

    Patrice, you go, girl! You have no need to apologize. I took your posting as saying, "Look what I saw. Go figure." that's all it was. I'd expect a citified fashionista to react similarly after a trip to the country. Why bother being offended?

    ReplyDelete
  36. Life is choices, good and bad. As we go along, hopefully we learn to make better and better ones. She's still on the first rung of the ladder of life. If she had climbed any higher, she would not have bragged about, much less admitted, how much money she spent on shoes and purses (handbags, she called them). Yes, she bragged. She also writes, "she is the type of girl", which tells a lot about her. She is either very young (girl) or an adult woman who still refers to herself in the child form. Both explain the poor choices she's making, especially her lashing out at you. Immature.

    You never said for others to not make the choice to buy those shoes. She apparently saw something personal in your remarks and went on the attack. I would not waste any time worrying about someone who worries about an opinion written on a blog. Your opinions are yours and they did not hurt her one bit, she could have just done the mature thing and not continued to read.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Well, here's the thing: I have lived both lives, rural farmgirl and city girl, because of my upbringing and my career, respectively.

    I am here to tell you that the lifestyles of the city girl types, who proudly proclaim their shoe budget and wish they had been the ones on Sex and the City, well, if they were living different lifestyles, there would be no need to be a "prepper". You'd just be a "live-r." You could live your life peacefully, preparing against a hard winter and possible illness, not prepping against economic and social collapse.

    Did I just blame city girls for the recession? I might have. Maybe they aren't the sole reason, but they are major contributors. Let's look at the financial profile of the proud shoe collector! Any savings? Living on credit? What about the bankruptcy rate among older shoe collectors, who have years of rising credit card debt collected as well?

    There has always been the rank of "helpless female." In different times, we were helpless because we couldn't own land, were forced into corsets, couldn't vote. Now, these females, who would be UTTERLY USELESS in any kind of crisis situation, take the helpless road by choice. Yes, I believe they are heartily deserving of mocking. They are both cause and symptom of what's wrong. Yanno?

    ReplyDelete
  38. I consider myself to be VERY low maintenance (the last time I bought a new pair of shoes was when??) but coming from a family of four girls in 4 different directions, I have come to realize that every single person is on their own journey with their own pitfalls and their own brick walls. I had to go through the spending ridiculous amounts of money on things that mattered not one whit in order to come to the understanding of what is really important. I grew up frugal, but when I was given the opportunity to spend money, oh boy, did I ever. But I learned that what Jesus said is really true: "For where your treasure is, so will your heart be also." Our treasure can be money, clothes, land, loans, cars, being debt free, etc. or it can be in Jesus Christ.

    I have come to realize that God places each of us where we can be most effective or most educated in the things of His truth. Those in the city forget that God uses people in the country for His good purpose and people in the country forget that He uses people in the city for His good purpose. He uses people who are in debt and those who have no debt. And he wakes us all up to our idols when we are willing to listen. Well, the lady had her rant but she has her own idols - but she might have actually read something that will give her an "ah ha!" moment later on! Who knows? Hugs :-)

    ReplyDelete
  39. as someone who gets snarky remarks on her blog a lot- don't look for them, i delete them lol- i too wonder, if you disagree with the author so much then why on earth are you here?! i love your blog just as it is! and thousands on shoes etc? that is sickening!!! these are exactly the types that will suffer when it all hits the fan- you can't eat a purse!

    ReplyDelete
  40. For what it's worth, I do sympathize with folks who find comments like the ones in your original post to be arrogant. Not everyone is living your life...not even everyone who might benefit from your blog, and "what's a prudent choice for milking the cows" is not necessarily the _only_ valid criterion of choice in life. :)

    On the other hand, as someone about as far from your lifestyle as it's possible to be while still enjoying anything at all you have to say, I'll concur that the stuff you actually showed pictures of is pretty far out-there on the absurdity scale. I'm not saying that those shoes are _as_ inappropriate for, say, a downtown office as they are for a barnyard, but persistently dressing that way for work is going to get one looked at funny, regardless of what sort of environment one works in.

    It's worth remembering, though, that the folks you're trying to convince aren't living your life...they're living theirs, and theirs are pretty radically different from yours. Yours is probably better for you, and might -- if tried -- prove better for them too, but you're not going to win converts by mocking anything and everything that doesn't fit your lifestyle as being completely crazy for anybody. (That's probably not what you intended to do. But to those of us who neither own cows nor are even in the process of acquiring some, it's what ironic speculation on wearing such and such an article of clothing to milk the cows sounds like.)

    I like your blog. Which is why I read it. When something you post comes off as annoyingly self-superior, I just sigh and move on to the next post, rather than sending off a complaint email. It's not like it happens every day. This is America -- and more importantly, the blogosphere -- and you can be, should be, and are totally free to write whatever you feel like in whatever tone pleases you. But since the topic has come up, and since I seem to be the only one around here who sees the issue from both sides, I felt I'd point out an alternate perspective.

    If you hope to convince people, best not to project the assumption that everything they have done and are currently doing in their existing lives is completely and irredeemably worthless, eh? It's self-defeating (not to mention rude) when city-dwelling hipsters look down their noses at rural rubes, and it's just as much so when it's the other way 'round.

    ReplyDelete