Sometimes when I wonder whether to address a topic here on the blog, I go with "clusters." What I mean is, I'll see or read something and think, "Huh. That's interesting." And then, unconnected to the original source, I'll see something else on the same subject and think, "Maybe I should write something about this." Clusters.
Often, of course, the coverage is clustered solely because it's a topic trending in the news; and that's why I'm discussing today's subject: YOLO living.
YOLO, as I'm sure you know, is an acronym for "You Only Live Once." It's been trending lately as a rather despairing response to high costs of living and low wages, and the frustrations that people – especially younger adults – feel with an economy that's against them.
YOLO living is exemplified by reckless spending on unnecessary items (including travel) because, hey, you only live once. It's often referenced in contrast to the nose-to-the-grindstone attitude of earlier generations.
Consider, for example, this video about a young woman complaining about her $8 coffee while drinking $8 coffee. I can't embed the video here, so I transcribed it. She says:
"So as I'm sitting here, sipping this $8 coffee, I'm just wondering if I'm the only girl living in the delulu land, because I cannot afford this $8 coffee. I honestly can't afford s***. I can't afford my car, my house, groceries ... I mean, like, how can this coffee be $8 when minimum wage is literally, like $8? So excuse me while I just continue to live in the delulu land while I continue go get my coffees I can't afford, because I'm going to continue to live and dig myself deeper and deeper and deeper into a gigantic financial hole because it cost too much to f***ing live. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. Bye."
Don is the one who brought this video to my attention by asking, "How much does coffee cost per pound these days?"
I had just been to the city for my once-a-quarter Big Shopping, so I knew precisely how much coffee costs. "I just filled up some bags with fresh-ground coffee at Winco for $8 a pound," I replied.
That's when he pointed out this video on the $8 coffee, and we speculated how many coffee drinks could be made with a pound of ground coffee. Short answer: a lot.
But hey, you only live once, right? Why shouldn't this woman enjoy her expensive coffee? Everyone deserves a little treat now and then.
The problem, I'm speculating, is the $8 coffee is not just "now and then," nor is it the only thing she recklessly spends money on. As she admits, she's "going to continue to live and dig myself deeper and deeper and deeper into a gigantic financial hole because it cost too much to f***ing live."
I sense her frustration. I sympathize with her frustration. But how will it end? The debt won't go away just because she's frustrated and angry and feel she deserves the occasional treat.
Now consider this article: "Economists are sounding alarm on 'YOLO' credit bubble." The author writes, "A growing percentage of Americans are becoming reckless with their spending, fueling what one economist calls a 'super duper' credit bubble. In a note to clients, economist David Rosenberg of Rosenberg Research warned that Americans are taking on too much debt to buy things they really don't need. He calls these people 'YOLO spenders,' which refers to the catchphrase, 'You only live once.'"
The article goes on to document the amount of credit card debt people are taking on, reaching all-time highs, and points out the obvious dangers of splurging on credit when it can't be paid off.
YOLO spending differs from survival spending. In this economy, a lot
of people are maxing out their credit cards simply to pay their bills. I
get that. I totally get that. In the past, we had crushing credit card debt due to the economic reality of raising a
family on a very tight income. It took many years to climb out of that financial hole. In fact, those debt years left me with something of a pathological fear of owing money.
While I understand – and sympathize – with the frustration expressed by the young woman in the video, I can't help but feel there are better ways to go about enjoying the small pleasures of life without digging yourself "deeper and deeper and deeper into a gigantic financial hole."
Debt is terrifying enough if it's incurred simply for survival. But debt incurred simply to live it up seems like madness.
What advice would you offer this young woman, besides not buying $8 coffees?
If she wasn't living at home she would not be buying $8 coffees. I did the same thing to a minor extent as a young person, but the desire to get out on my on had me start saving for my own transportation. Reality hit when I actually moved and found out how many bills were really necessary.
ReplyDeleteBuying groceries including coffee quickly became a no brainer. Eating out or eating at all was a choice, and sometimes it is easier to choose when faced with choices like that.
She'll learn. She isn't going to want to stay home very long. Later on, if special coffee is really something important to her, she'll buy a fancy machine or figure out knock off recipes to make it cheaper to enjoy.
I would suspect that this girl comes from a family where the parents also buy coffees out or atleast are surrounded by many conveniences. My teenage/young adult children all know how to make coffee (including grinding the beans!) and cook meals from scratch. They are all frugal and just amazed at the money other kids their age blow through. Our oldest is in college and is continuously regaling us with tales of other college students that can barely boil water, let alone prepare a home-cooked meal. All our kids know how to make things like bread and pancakes from scratch. Once the "mystery" of creating these things is eliminated, there is a can-do spirit that emerges and that blends over into other areas of their lives. Same college kid had a roommate that survived on frozen premade pancakes and daily DutchBros. Poor roommate had no idea how to do anything beyond put premade things in a toaster or microwave. (Same roommate just failed out last semester... ) This generation is our future and it is not looking so hot... :( :(
ReplyDeleteYounger generation don't understand or care about the difference between necessity and luxury. Don't want to spend the TIME to make coffee? Buy it out somewhere else. Having parents who went through The Great Depression had an impact on me, younger generations didn't have that example on a daily basis. Over a trillion dollars in consumer debt in this country now is due in part to so many walking about with a cuppa Joe in their hands.
ReplyDeleteTrack spending. Then make a budget.
ReplyDeleteif you don't have a marketablke skill that can be used in Anytown U.S.A. (population under 5000), get one. NO, NOT COLLEGE. trade school or the school of hard knocks. there is not much demand for I.T. techs in Smallvile, but they do need electricians, plumbers, construction workers, and forklift operators,
ReplyDeletethen, get the heck out of MEGALOPOLIS. it's much less expensive to live in Hicktown, middle of nowhere, fly over land. sure you don't have the bright lights, big city 24/7 excitement, but your bills will be paid, and you can, occasionally cash out an $8 coffee
I have seven children (ages 32 to 12) and we’ve lived on one income the whole time so I have a ton of advice. The problem is I don’t think this gal wants any advice, she wants to live this way. If anyone wants to learn to squeeze every penny I highly recommend “The Complete Tightwad Gazette” book by Amy Dacyczyn. Some of the suggestions might be outdated, but the principles still apply.
ReplyDeleteTHINK YOU ARE RIGHT SHELLYin WI
DeleteYou are right, Shelly. It will dawn on her one day soon that she's being lied to about a lot of things, but in particular her $8 coffee doesn't do anything for HER, but does a lot for Starbucks. Perhaps she will really open her eyes and see that her happiness does not come from anything material. I pray that these people find their true path in llife and see that Ourlord JesusChrist is the only way.
DeleteI have 5 children. I agree w/ the Tightwad Gazette. I used to get the newsletter.
DeleteThere have been times in my life a relative that I will tell someone I do something frugal. Their response is, "I couldn't do that!" Of course not. They just put their hand out to their parent when times get tough.
People feel "entititled". No one wants to "make do or do without".
Debbie from MA
Unfortunately our government is not setting a very good example on how to wisely use one's income. There are, however plenty of wise individuals around, both on the internet and probably in her community, that could teach her. She will have to stop complaining and make an effort to do something about it, though. Nobody will be too interested in doing and providing everything FOR her.
ReplyDeleteIn TikTok videos talking about spending on luxuries rather than necessities, the young people mention "The government doesn't care about its debt, why should I care about mine?"
DeleteAlso, I think there's a feeling of an $8 coffee being more managable than the $200 it takes to renew your car registration. I know for me, large amounts (large to the person, I mean) can feel overwhelming and you can just avoid/ignore them.
I knew many young divorced women who lost their homes because they liked to party or go on weekend trips. They sort of edged me out of the friend circle because I would not participate in things they loved. That's okay because I did not lose my house, paid it off, and got a couple of degrees. They were not willing to think of anything but fun and remarrying many times.
ReplyDeleteMany, many years ago I was one of those women. I was taken in by "you can do it all"! I learned, afterr divorcing a man who truly loved me, that you cannot do it all. I left in my wake a brokenhearted husband and a daughter who went on this ride with me. I wish I could go back and undo everything. Regrets? I have too many to count.
DeleteIt’s difficult to explain to her, because in her mind, YOLO is painless in the moment. It’s not her money she’s spending…it’s credit from an overlord banking system, and eventually she’ll need to pay it back. Connecting cash in your pocket and banking credit on that card, are hard to realize when one is in YOLO.! Great post, Patrice!
ReplyDeleteI agree with this so much! She's young, so I'm not sure it's even really hit her that she WILL have to pay it back. To her, it's a painless coffee today, and tomorrow will never come.
DeleteAnd yeah, there's a lot of "oppressed by the system" thinking, which I think is pretty silly for all the privelege we have in this country.
YOLO spells "Immediate Gratification" or "I deserve it and I want it now" or "there is no tomorrow, only today." We have raised several generations of self-centered, narcissistic, self-absorbed, entitled whiners who never grow up and take responsibility for their life or their actions. Everything is someone else's fault, but certainly not their fault. They blame their parents for life's failures. These darling children "deserve" the performance trophy for just showing up. And, when reality hits them in the face, they post a social media video whining about how cruel life is and how they "deserve" so much more.
ReplyDeleteThanks for letting me rant.
Considering how the last few generations feel about "boomers" and Gen X, there is probably nothing that can said to her or most of her generation. We are partially to blame, but their overall dismissal of what advice we can offer is a high hurdle. These later generations are very much focused on the here and now, instant gratification. What strikes me the most is these later generations are very smart and well connected. Wisdom has been chasing them, but they always been faster.
ReplyDelete