In-your-face stuff from an opinionated
rural north Idaho housewife.
You know, I do support a basic level of sex education. Maybe it's part of my liberalism hangover, but I remember all too clearly having to explain to too many of my conservative Christian peers that the blood coming out of their "lady parts" was the onset of menstruation and not them bleeding to death (and then farther having to explain what menstruation was, what a sanitary napkin was, where to get one, and how to use it). I kid you not. One of those formative experiences of childhood that made me very thankful that my mother was somewhat liberal (at least for the time and place where I was raised, talking to a prepubescent girl about menstruation bordered on radical liberalism) and a nurse. I remember having to explain to too many girls that "sex" wasn't the same as "liking a boy" or "letting a boy touch your hair." I remember too clearly having to explain to girls who were old enough to know what human sex organs were. As we were all familiar with urination, the female sex organs were easy to explain. My knowledge was sketchy in my early teens; the male organ was a bit more difficult and I did not understand ALL of the mechanics (I was 17 when I worked up the nerve to ask my dad how you got the little floppy thing into the hole). I do believe in a basic level of sex education, because I saw too many parents who suddenly became blind to sin nature when the subject became providing their children with sex education. The mantra of the time was, "If we don't talk about it, they won't do it." Would it were that simple, but THAT DOESN'T WORK. I saw too many pregnant sixteen-year-olds cut loose by horrified good Christian parents. Too many boys who knew that those urges were bad but didn't know how to control them and weren't stopped by their shame. I'm not advocating for the current model of sex education. The current model of sex education is sick and sad and a least every bit as damaging as an "Abstinence Only Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy. Even as I remember all those girls I had to teach what menstruation was, I also remember being a nineteen-year-old virgin who felt like a freak for not being willing to have casual sex (and I wasn't even saving myself for marriage, just a caring and committed relationship with a guy I'd dated for about a year and felt comfortable with). Just as "Don't Ask Don't Tell" creates too many tragedies like the one I witnessed, "Just Do It" makes too many tragedies like the one I became. It is hard for me to understand why it is so difficult for us to come up with a program that teaches the basic facts along with the message that sexual feelings are normal and healthy but sex outside of marriage really, really, really isn't good for you, is incredibly dangerous, and should be avoided. With an after-chapter about how to be safe if you should fall victim to temptation (or for that matter simply find yourself needing to prevent pregnancy within the bounds of healthy marital sex). Would they really all run off to make like rabbits if we taught them about the process of puberty, menstrual management, hormones and emotions and how they influence decision making, how to at least minimize the risk in the unfortunate circumstance that you give in to the hormones and emotions, and how to prevent pregnancy without drowning yourself in artificial hormones should your future self and your future spouse come to the realization that a child at this time would be a very difficult blessing to accept??
well in the 70's in my school had sex ed . and NO moral teaching about marriage and yes everyone ran about like sex crazed rabbits including me...I do not believe for a moment those in power in the educational system have any desire to teach any form of morality along with the physical facts. And the whole system continuely teaches that parent are the problem and teachers are the saviours of all the social problems...My girls were not allowed to take sex ed in school , however I taught them at home and they had several friends raised the same way who have survived the teen highschool years without any sexual drama or disease or heartbreak .They are well informed , I attribute some of this to the fact that we had plenty of animals around so that sex was not a subject we were shy to bring up...when the rooster and chickens are "doing it" in front of your 6 year old the subject naturally comes up! Karen
Thank you for teaching them. My problem isn't with parents who want to teach their kids about this stuff themselves. My problem is with parents who don't teach their kids at all.It happens too often. And then, if "sex ed" doesn't do it, nobody does. The results are just as bad as, "Go ahead and do whatever feels good."
if the school would simply offer a plain biology lesson on it , even I would be ok with that....and schools have been teaching sex ed since the 60's 70's...., you now have to opt your child OUT . BUT they are NOT just teaching the biology of it...I watched the 5th ? grade sex ed film and it encouraged "healthy experimentation" like it was a dang sport , "suit up and have fun" ! they might have well have said. The 1st grade "unsafe touch" film felt like mild porn in a way, with the funny uncle always aluding to touching the boy....I allowed that film but watched it with her ,, then afterwards think I could have done a better job of teaching that myself..so opted out of the govt. I am the parent and if had decided to keep my child ignorant , then wouldn't that be my right as a parent anyway? Of course most people would think that isn't sensible , but most people turn that responsibility over to govt schools and that isn't sensible either in my opinion.Karen
The thing is, this is solely the responsibility of the parents and doesn't belong to any school, government agency, etc.So, we don't need a program for it, it isn't anyone's business except the family involved.
I have found that the people who want to sexualize children are often the same people who want to have sex with those children.I find the idea of my wife in a negligee rather appealing. I find the idea of a child in a negligee rather revolting. But that's because I am attracted to women, and not to children. Looking at Hollywood and the fashion industry, can we say the same about them? No, we can not.
I agree with this completely , I see the media is putting out now the little thing about Woody Allans successful marriage (to basicly his stepdaughter) I think they continuely test the climate to see how fast they can push this....
All my pals and I had public school 'sex ed' in 6th grade, waaay back in the 60's. None of us kids knew anything much about sex at all, although plenty of mis-info went around. Not all of them were Christian and I'm a bit offended by the first poster branding the naive and misinformed 'Christian' Me and my family were far from being Christian in any way, shape or form! What I remember about that one week of 'sex ed' films, is that we learned about boys bodies vs girls, girls learned about their periods and we were all informed that sex (still a mystery) made BABIES and there were some forms of birth control but abstaining til marriage was the best thing to do, and it might be hard to do, because a crush can lead to 'imtimacy' without alot of self control. This was not a bad overview, and let alot of embarrassed parents off the hook IMHO Sadly, we have come a long, long loooong way from those common sense early beginnings. Parents now have to dive in there aggressively and thoughtfully COMBAT the invasive onslaught of early (actually never ending) sexualization. If you don't, your children will be swept away by the rip-tide.I have sons now grown and are parents themselves. I personally taught them way back when, that they ought not to have sex unless they were sure they were ready to father children and could support them financially. Now there is a condom for you. I also told them to protect their girlfriends body and feelings. I have helped to raise my Grandaughter, and the first thing on the agenda was to turn off the TV, including the family and kids channels. Early on, iCarly was the VERY popular kids show she was drawn to....smart alec kids with no parents, no respect for adults and loud, bratty behavior. A VERY popular show with kids. The children were supposed to be 12ish but of course, dressed like little teens. Monitoring TV doesn't just mean blocking the Playboy channel, while telling yourself all is well because 'my kids watch Disney and Nickolodian" iCarly was a Nic brainwashing, child corrupting, mind numbing baby sitting machine for millions of wide eyed children, and PASSIVE adults. 'It must be ok, it's Nickolodian"The point being...if you don't raise your children, someone else will. If that doesn't scare you into action, then why did you become a parent in the first place, I have to wonder?Thanks for another great commentary Patrice. And thanks for opportunity to rant, too!
Glad to read your wise comment .
Honestly I cannot imagine giving government unfettered access to our children. Introduction of 'Common Core' was the last straw.The effort to 'undoctrinate' (yes, I know that is not a word) our children would be overwhelming. It would be like trying to break bad habits. It is infinitely easier to build good habits.Montana Guy